Toilet Breath: A Weird, Remarkably Effective Stress Management Hack
💩🌬️This 30-second tool can help you survive just about anything... even active labor
Welcome to The Psychology of Thriving at Work! This publication is dedicated to enhancing women's and moms' careers and well-being with science-based tips and career coaching tools. The gal behind the pen is Lydia Fogo Johnson, MS, ACC, a holistic career coach, organizational psychology consultant, neurospicy mom, and matrescence expert. Subscribe for free to receive articles in your inbox, or upgrade for premium benefits.
Ready to learn a handy, 30-second stress management strategy that I learned from… my doula?
Yep, you read the right. Today’s Quick Tip Tuesday is inspired by the amazing doula who helped me survive my pregnancy, labor, and delivery.
Today’s tool is… toilet breath.
When I was pregnant, my doula taught me how to use long, deep exhales paired with intentional full-body relaxation to prepare for the onslaught of labor and delivery.
So, my doula’s sage advice? Practice it every time you are on the toilet.
I think this was partially because of some labor-prep-specific pelvic floor positioning needs… but regardless, this is actually a brilliant behavioral change hack called cueing or habit stacking. Or, if you’re a mindfulness practitioner, you might consider it a mindfulness bell, like the tones that resonate throughout a monastery to bring practitioners back into the present moment.
Behavioral change strategies like this are incredibly helpful because it’s easier to sandwich a new behavior into an existing routine (like your bathroom routine!) than starting from scratch or remembering unprompted.
Here’s Your QTT Homework:
Every time you use the bathroom for the next week…
Take a long inhale through the nose (e.g., 4 seconds)
Pause at the top
Take a very long exhale through the mouth (e.g., 8 seconds)
While exhaling, try to fully relax your whole body, letting go of any tension or tightness. You’re no longer an anxiety-ridden, rigged human— you’re a deflating human-shaped balloon.
Repeat your breathing and relaxing at least 3 times every bathroom visit.
Bonus: Make another reminder on your phone with a daily notification. You can even name it something less weird than “toilet breath” if you want.
This tool still helps me today. It helped me when I learned it over two years ago and was pregnant while working a high-stress corporate consultation job. This tool sure hell helped me when I accidentally waited to go to the hospital until I was in active labor. In fact, I credit relaxation techniques like this as the reason why I was able to walk into the hospital 9cm dilated and have the nurses question if I should be checking in yet because I seemed so chill. No one believed I was that far along, or at least not until my water dramatically broke when filling out the check-in forms! 🙃
So, give it a try, and let me know if it works for you in the comments.
Wait, Why Does Breathing & Muscle Relaxation Work?
Deep breaths and intentional muscle relaxation are game-changing stress management and centering tools that are useful to anyone, whether you’re preparing to push a baby out of your body, pitch a giant presentation, or just trying to mitigate the long-term damage of chronic stress and burnout.
Why do breathing and muscle relaxation work? Because you’re activating your parasympathetic nervous system, which tells your body, “Hey, it’s OK— we aren’t running from a bear. You can sit here for a minute and take some deep breaths instead of preparing to sprint for your life.”
Remember, we’re still pretty much walking around with caveman brains. Our bodies are wired to run from short-term, physical threats (like bears)… not face down a stress-inducing 9-5 (or 8-8, I see you Ms. Overworked) every day. When you’re stuck in chronic stress mode, your body is literally preparing to fight, flight, or freeze (blackout when being eaten by said bear). So, let’s send it lots of signals that we’re actually safe and our jobs won’t actually hunt us and eat us, okay?
Do you want to learn more easy, actionable, and science-based stress management tips like this?
Well, would you look at that? I’ve got a whole coaching session designed just for you!
It’s called the Stress Management Starter Kit, and it’s as easy as 1-2-3:
Book your 45-minute session for just $97
Take a 5-minute Stress & Burnout assessment
Jump on your debrief call to design your personalized Stress Management Kit
In less time and money than your last extra fancy date night, you’ll learn where you fall on the stress-burnout spectrum, gain six new stress management and work/life boundary tools, and create a personalized stress management & habit change plan that you’ll actually stick with for the long-term.
👋If we haven’t met yet, nice to meet you; I’m Lydia Fogo Johnson, MS. I’m a holistic career and burnout coach for women and moms. My writing and coaching focus on career fulfillment, workplace well-being, mental health, stress/burnout recovery and prevention, work/life balance, and motherhood.